| 2008 - The Year In Review | |||||
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You may or may not remember my amazing predictions for this past year, 2008. It’s all for the better if you don’t since none of them turned out to be accurate. Hillary Clinton, as we all know will not be our president, the Patriots didn’t win the Super Bowl and as far as I know airport toilet stalls have not been enlarged to allow for wider stances. However, the year 2008 will undoubtedly be recorded as a landmark year on the pages of history. Who can’t remember where they were when they heard the news of a “man” giving birth for the first time in the history of the world? The date was June 29th, 2008, I was cutting the grass when my wife came running out of the house with the news—it was incredible. And who will ever forget the 2008 Olympic games in China, from the spectacular opening ceremony to Michael Phelps winning a record eight gold medals? Of course record high gas prices, risky lending practices and out of control government spending all contributed to the most serious economic crisis faced by the United States since the Great Depression. Future generations of Americans will be able to look back to 2008 as the year all of our hard-earned tax dollars were simply given away to any incompetent corporate executive who came calling with their hat in hand by our brain-dead and morally bankrupt politicians. This was also the year we lost icons and old friends in people such as Paul Newman, Tim Russert, George Carlin and Eartha Kitt. We saw O.J. Simpson finally get locked up for what should be the rest of his life for stealing back his own stuff. Weird, huh? Kill two people, retire to the golf course, steal your own stuff from some shady character and you go to prison—what a country. Then there was this election thing that seemed to consume every waking moment of every single day throughout the entire year. Seems that after all the bumper stickers, lawn signs, mudslinging and name calling the American people chose the black dude with the funny name and the human gaff machine over the old guy with a comb-over and the MILF to run the country. This was truly a remarkable year. |
