|The Flies In October|
I was just dive bombed again! Every time the door is open, flies run in like customers at Wal-Mart at a “two for one sale.” My door faces the setting sun and at sunset, they just cover that side of the building. I know they are just trying to stay warm.
I am in Montana on another nursing assignment. I realize flies, farms, and ranches go together and there are a lot of those up here. I also think they are attracted to humans. I guess they like our food better then the stuff they find outside.
I realize nature has a purpose for everything and I really hate killed anything. After all flies have families too and I can imagine how I would feel if a giant fly swatter came down out of the sky and squished a member of my family. I would be a little ticked off and I would get even. I think flies feel the same way because if you kill one there’s a dozen that will show up to plan the funeral and another dozen come just to get even.
I tried catching a fly in a cup and carefully walking it out the door. I was careful not to break my cup and not to hurt the little fly but as soon as I moved my hand the fly beat me back in the house. A whole gang of his friends flew in behind me before I could get the door closed.
I read that flies have an average life span of 7-10 days and they produce 10-12 generations annually. Now folks that a lot of lovemaking! I think the females are on fertility drugs and the males are getting free Viagra. They are certainly getting something FREE.
They certain are experts at “The Quickie”. They have rabbits beat. I do not think they say “Hello” or even ask for names. About two seconds and it’s over.
I can hear the conversation now. A baby fly is talking to its mother.
“Mommy! Who’s my Daddy?”
“Well Dear, that was days ago. Do you expect me to remember every body’s name?”
As Bill Crosby said once, “Flies go BUZZZZZ but in October they go BUZzzzzzzzzzzzz. That’s when they start acting weird. They sort of just stagger about and bump into things. They get caught in curtains and buzz loudly about it, as if it is the curtains fault. I saw a drunk yell at a brick wall once because it was in his way. The flies are doing the same thing.
They act like they are stoned, but then again they may be worn out from all that baby making. I just know they fly like they are drunk or something. I saw one try to fly through a windowpane and one was doing pushups on a mirror. I don’t think he realized his girl friend had flown away with another fly. Maybe she thought he was too slow.
I am sure the winter here in Montana will cool their libido real soon and send them to “bug heaven.” I maybe wrong but I’d rather see snowflakes then flies. It would take a lot of snowflakes to convience otherwise
Now if I can just manage to not swat the snowflakes. The people up here think I am half-crazy as it is. They really don’t need any more proof.